Telephone/Office Version

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qsU9tz3d3OY

Hello hello girlfriend, no no I can't do a thing
Cuz I am stuck up in this f***ing office building
Wha-Wha-Wha-What did you say?
What guy you gonna bring?
Oh sh*t, I gotta go right now
My boss is coming
My boss is coming
My boss is coming
Sorry gotta go,
My f***ing boss is coming
Just a week
vacation and I know where I would be
Party in New Delhi
With our outsourced I.T.
When I drink my second coffee,
Get my energy
It will go right through me
Now I'm kinda gassy.
CHORUS
Stop callin', stop callin',
I don't wanna work any more
Passive aggressive micro managing manwhore
Stop callin', stop callin',
I don't wanna troubleshoot for
The customers who bought online from our web store.
Eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh...
Stop telephonin' me!
Eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh...
I'm busy!
Eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh...
Stop telephonin' me!
Eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh, eh...
Can call all you want,
but I'll put you on hold
and you're not gonna reach my telephone!
Out on break,
With some birthday cake,
and you're not gonna reach my telephone!
x2
All my boss' post-it notes
won't make me type no faster
check my email faster
scan these files no faster
I should of worked from home in bed
Cause Michael Scott's my master
Harrassin like a bastard
F*ck it - I'm gettin plastered
Not that I don't like my job,
Just rather party.
And I am sick and tired
of all this team building
Sometimes I feel like
I'm workin at Dunder Mifflin,
Today I'm not doin no work
'Cause I'll be dancin'.
'Cause I'll be dancin'.
and this ain't Scranton.
Today I'm not doin' no work
'Cause I'll be dancin.

piggehs

have gone away til saturday to spend some time eating grass and meeting ladypiggehs. one of them is actually called lady, the other is sandy. :-) lucky piggehs.

congrats to the lady of teh anthology

Not a red rose or a satin heart.I give you an onion.

It is a moon wrapped in brown paper.

It promises light

like the careful undressing of love.Here.It will blind you with tearslike a lover.

It will make your reflection

a wobbling photo of grief.I am trying to be truthful.Not a cute card or a kissogram.I give you an onion.

Its fierce kiss will stay on your lips,

possessive and faithful

as we are,

for as long as we are.Take it.

Its platinum loops shrink to a wedding-ring,

if you like.Lethal.

Its scent will cling to your fingers,

cling to your knife.

Congrats to Carol Ann Duffy,

"Carol Ann Duffy has been named Britain's poet laureate. Duffy, the first woman to hold the post in its 341-year history, is known for a wide and varied body of modern poetry."

She's also the first openly gay person to has this title. Also, this is a fab pic!

quoted

"They just like get words to replace other words that are like 10 letters longer."

"I don't wanna learn things that make me sound like a pompous arsehole"

- Piend, on A Level English

new gym shoes

new blisters on feet... (luckily i won't upload a pic of them!) spa tomorrow i think! w00p! yay holidays!

win sum loose sum

so after a second interview i lost out on a cool youth worky job to someone who is more 'in touch with local stuff' than me... yeh i just wont go there... not here. :-(

so i am like 'boo hiss' all night sulky sulk sulk smoke grump

then some wickedcool person gives away train tickets from neath to wivenhoe on freecycle!! yay!! i get to come bk and see my friends in teh 'stead and maybe see some of my yoofs! lalalaaa!! I am happy again.

international no diet day

I Pledge —

· That I will not diet for one day, on May 6, International No Diet Day.

· Instead of trying to change my body to fit someone else's standards, I will accept myself just as I am.

· I will feed myself if I'm hungry.

· I will feel no shame or guilt about my size or about eating.

· I will think about whether dieting has improved my health and well-being or not.

· And I will try to do at least one thing I have been putting off "until I lose weight."

http://www.largesse.net/INDD/

books shcmooks

I found this essay online:

http://www.nerve.com/personalessays/shukert/theanorexicscookbook/index.asp?page=1

and liked the writer so much that her book is on it's way to me via amazon, and should reach me in... 3 weeks lol but yeh whatever.

The book i ordered is called "Have You No Shame?: And Other Regrettable Stories"

and it looks like one giant mess of a book, with some grim stories and a kinda funny edge. i need something funny about now, there's too much to worry about in the world!!

Xtina Quote

I don't believe in fashion faux pas. Every look I did was important at the time. When I was in the Lady Marmalade video it was all about being over the top, sexy and playful. The big hair, the make-up, it was so much fun. Would I do that today? Probably not. It was a different time, a different place for me.

Everybody has an opinion on what I wear, especially about the outfits that were perceived as being very provocative. Some people were really closed-minded and judgmental. Fashion should be fun; lots of people take it way too seriously.

http://women.timesonline.co.uk/

things that make me smile

today i went to work (at 3pm lol, i love my job) and the sun was shining, and lily allen was on the rad. her song 'smile' made my summer last year!

so i thought i would make a list of things that make me smile - here goes:

1. Sunshine - i love the summer, it is by far the best season ever and I CANT WAIT for this summer.
2. Late nights, warmth and light til late - make the day so much longer! Again, I love.
3. Summer songs - (there is a theme going on here) but estelle & kanye west's new song, american boy is cool in a summertime way (i'msure i will be really annoyed by it in a couple weeks but meh.. LDN and Smile are also groovy summer choons and this time of year i am SO GLAD i'm not listening to the wrong radio station.
4. Bright colours - green, yellow, blue, orange, pink - u name it and i love it.
5. BBQs - as a veggie i love BBQs as much as the next fish.. i just always has to bring my own stuffs! bah... but i LOVE too.
6. Driving... to THE BEACH or anywhere for that matter, bovverd not.
7. Summer hols - school hols mean much more work for me, and i love my work.
8. Smoking.. aaah i love smoking. Bad, so limited.
9. Wrapping all my food up in tortillas. I don't know what i did before I discovered this awesomeness.
10. Pretty things, and shopping. Erk, and i have got to number 10 without mentioning RUM. I will have to dedicate a post to it 2muro or something. :)

pippy longstockings

In the window was a large jar of freckle salve, and beside the jar was a sign which read: DO YOU SUFFER FROM FRECKLES?

“What does the sign say?” asked Pippi. She couldn’t read very well because she didn’t want to go to school as other children did.

“It says, ‘Do you suffer from freckles?’” Annika said.

“Does it indeed?” said Pippi thoughtfully. “Well, a civil question deserves a civil answer. Let’s go in.”

She opened the door and entered the shop, closely followed by Tommy and Annika.

An elderly lady stood back of the counter. Pippi went right up to her.

“No!” she said decidedly.

“What is it you want?” asked the lady.

“No,” said Pippi once more.

“I don’t understand what you mean,” said the lady.

“No, I don’t suffer from freckles,” said Pippi. Then the lady understood but she took one look at Pippi and burst out, “But, my dear child, your whole face is covered with freckles!”

“I know it,” said Pippi, “but I don’t suffer from them. I love them. Good morning.”

march

march has been a crap month for me, in so many ways, but i have had a few cool nights out, numerous exotic and stylish illnesses and many moments of weepyness and silly womanness. april will be a better month. true. i've never been one for thinking a whole month is cursed etc but plenny has gone wrong this month, i have found myself calmly counting my blessings numerous times.

on the plus side, i am thinner, and this is great because... er.. well it isn't at all actually, i've been really mopey. must stop worrying about such stupid shit as weight. life is too important.

see: the fantasy of being thin
and this little bit of pippy longstockings genius

now is time to post some of the things that made me smile lately... *thinks*