Monday 8 December 2008

dear E.S.


when you get *really good* at photoshopping, you can remove hips, muscles in peoples legs, other offensive shapes etc, and add more boobies and fake tan to pics of people:

the internet

never tell the internet anything you wouldn't say in front of everyone you have ever known, and everyone you are ever likely to know. it's a dreadful gossip.

Thursday 4 December 2008

today in 'things that annoy me'

dear magazine 'doctor'

i went to bed last night in my nice warm pjs, cosy socks and ear muffs as it was really really cold. my husband shouted at me, saying i'm not the woman he married 10 years ago. he's usually quite nice really. what shall i do?

dear worried lady

obviously you aren't the person he married, and he has probably been annoyed about this for quite some time, hence the sudden outburst. i can only advise you to sort it out. remember your sole duty is to please him, and this is all your fault/

um... fail

dear completly normal person

is your husband having a bit of a crisis? or has he only just realised after 10 years, that, like himself, you are a human who wears comfy warm things when cold, and is not there soley for his amusement? perhaps you should talk to him about what is actually annoying him before you both take it out on ur pjs.

love mince.

Tuesday 2 December 2008

my 200th posty

so i am not working this week due to stupid backache from my hectic life of being unemployed and having no life.

last week, to distract myself from the pain of mondays, before americans wake up and write things i can be bothered to read, i got myself an exercise ball. new exercise, new routine, new job, new friends at work, new yoofs to worry about lalala nice.

it arrived yesterday, before the back pain of doom cased an impromptu trip to a&e and today, since i am off work in pain etc, i am pumping it up.

now, contrary to my own opinion of myself (complicated) i really like exercise, i just have crappy memories of a lot of it. i had some good fun at uni, loved circuit training and old skool sweat, riding my bike around and chopping up logs... i go on too much

but anyway, it's kinda important for me to have fun with stuff and not to get wrapped up in weight loss and diets and hyper exercise, i get obsessive, then ill and it sucks.

this exercise ball says 'lighter life' on it. it's only small, but it's there, just a reminder that people to exercise to be lighter. i dont ever wanna think about that, i wanna do exercise to feel better, and i don't wanna keep making that connection that lighter = happier = better cuz as i say, its not good for me. but i'm still a bit meeh about it.